I don’t know about you, but New Years Eve this year felt… hard. I usually like to pause and reflect on the past year before the clock strikes midnight, but this year, the hours passed too quickly and the reflections were too unpleasant for me to do much of either. So I’m treating February as a reset. You’re invited to do the same. Welcome to a new month! Let’s take a beat.
So much of the way we talk about 2020 is about forgetting. We were so fast to want to look beyond this moment, to be beyond this moment. We’ve been trying to forget what is happening as it’s happening, as a form of denial. I, too, was so particularly eager to be able to look back at all this with hindsight that I filled pages of my journal with that wish. Yet, even back at the beginning, when all those tweets to the tune of: “When you find a mask in your pocket years from now, you’ll remember what a weird few months this was” were circling, it already rang hollow - even if we did naively think like it might only be a few months. (The recent comedic spins on that have been much appropriate.) Now, when I see that message or hear that sentiment, I can only think: “You’re going to be able to forget this??”
The little pockets of joy we’ve been able to find among it all, however, are at risk of being erased by the rest. That is what truly forgettable here, that it wasn’t all bad. I’ve found that joy has an incredibly short shelf-life these days. In the past, joyous moments would infuse the days that followed. Now, no matter how good of a weekend I have, by the end of Monday, any trace of joy feels long gone. In an attempt to strengthen joy’s shelf-life, to hold onto this year’s instances of happiness among all the monotony, I’m retelling them to myself, retracing the memories to strengthen their synapse. And I’m capturing them here and sharing them with you:
20 highlights from 2020:
New Years Day at Sutro Baths
Idyllwild cabin and a hot tub under the stars
Leap Day picnic in Dolores Park
Passing my drivers test in Sacramento
Night out with girls in LA
Long walks and journal entries to pass the hours
Escapes into nature to leave the house
Finding a cherry tree at the end of a hike
Summer Sundays in Sacramento by the pool
Swimming in the Pacific at Ocean Beach solo
Making a home in new neighborhood and its weekly farmers market
Quick trip to Ashland and a Mt. Ashland hike
Starting my new job at 826
Labor day Chrissy Field picnic with LA girls at sunset
Skinny dipping in the Russian River
Surf class in Half Moon Bay
Biden’s election victory!
Thanksgiving in Ojai and oysters by the beach
Kayaking in the bay for my birthday
Christmas in the redwoods
What’s on your 20 from 2020 list? Feel free to share in a comment or email response! Would also recommend writing a list of 2020 lowlights, and burning that one.